Recently, I ran a poll on Instagram, asking people how annual review conversations are handled in their companies. You know, those meetings that are supposed to be a growth moment for the employee and a chance for the company to understand what’s actually going on with their people.
The results were predictable, and still a little depressing.
The real problem? (Spoiler: It’s not just that some companies skip them)
Sure, some companies don’t do these conversations at all. But that’s not even the worst part. The real problem is how they’re done.
Here’s the usual scene: HR sends a template to all managers. The manager opens it five minutes before the meeting. Sits down across from the employee. Reads the questions from the list. Nods in the right places. Jots down a few generic notes. Checks the box in the system – and that’s it until next year.
The employee knows it’s a formality, so they keep it surface-level. The manager doesn’t dig deep – they’ve got eight more of these this week. HR sees the forms coming in and is happy the process is running. Everyone’s busy. But no one gets anything out of it.
Then we wonder: why are people burning out silently? Why do they quit without warning? Why aren’t they growing, even when they have potential? Because the real conversation never happened.
Why do managers treat it like a checkbox?
Let’s be honest: managers aren’t idiots. They don’t do pointless meetings out of malice. They often just don’t understand why it matters.
And when HR sends a top-down instruction with no context, it feels like just another task.
“Please complete your reviews by the end of the quarter.” The manager thinks: “Great, one more thing. My deadlines are on fire, my team’s overwhelmed, and now I need to sit for an hour asking if Tom is happy at work.”
If a manager doesn’t see what’s in it for them, they won’t invest in the process. And HR, the one designing it, is often far removed from real business life. They know about engagement from textbooks but don’t see the team chaos, the three people on vacation, the project falling apart. The result? A process for the sake of process.
What the business loses
When annual reviews turn into checkboxes, the business misses out on:
1. Spotting problems early
An employee has been thinking about quitting for six months but says “everything’s fine” during the meeting. Why? Because they don’t believe they’ll be heard. Because the person across the table looks disengaged.
2. Retaining valuable people
Sometimes people need very little: a different project, a new challenge, some feedback. But if they don’t say it (or say it and get no response) – they leave.
Internal growth opportunities
Someone might be ready to lead. Someone else wants to move laterally. But if those ambitions aren’t discussed or named, they just float unspoken. Eventually, the person leaves to grow somewhere else.
Bottom-up feedback
Annual reviews shouldn’t just be about the employee. They’re a chance to understand how the team is doing, what’s not working, where the friction is. If it’s just a formal talk, none of that will surface.
Sometimes people need very little: a different project, a new challenge, some feedback. But if they don’t say it (or say it and get no response) – they leave.
3. Internal growth opportunities
Someone might be ready to lead. Someone else wants to move laterally. But if those ambitions aren’t discussed or named, they just float unspoken. Eventually, the person leaves to grow somewhere else.
4. Bottom-up feedback
Annual reviews shouldn’t just be about the employee. They’re a chance to understand how the team is doing, what’s not working, where the friction is. If it’s just a formal talk, none of that will surface.
How it should work
An annual review isn’t about reporting. It’s a chance to pause and talk. Really talk.
About:
- Where the person is now – in the team, in the role, in the company
- What motivates or demotivates them (not in theory, but real things)
- Where they want to go next – or if they don’t, that’s valid too
- What they need to grow – training, feedback, new projects, space
What’s blocking them – processes, workload, relationships
How they see their results – and how their manager sees them (yes, this matters)
But this kind of conversation requires conditions: - What’s blocking them – processes, workload, relationships
- How they see their results – and how their manager sees them (yes, this matters)
But this kind of conversation requires conditions:
1. The manager needs to understand why it matters
Not because HR says so, but because it helps them work with their team. To see people. To retain them. To grow them. To prevent burnout.
The manager needs skills
To ask open questions, to listen (without interrupting or dismissing), to give feedback, to stay open when hard things come up.
There needs to be trust
If someone is afraid to speak honestly, they won’t. If they believe their words will be used against them, they’ll stay silent.
HR needs to be a partner, not a controller
Their role isn’t to collect forms – it’s to help managers prepare. To teach, to support, to give tools that work in real life.
Not because HR says so, but because it helps them work with their team. To see people, to retain them, to grow them, to prevent burnout.
2. The manager needs skills
To ask open questions, to listen (without interrupting or dismissing), to give feedback, to stay open when hard things come up.
3. There needs to be trust
If someone is afraid to speak honestly, they won’t. If they believe their words will be used against them, they’ll stay silent.
4. HR needs to be a partner, not a controller
Their role isn’t to collect forms – it’s to help managers prepare. To teach, to support, to give tools that work in real life.
What employees can do to get the most out of it
Let’s say you’re the employee, and you’ve got a review coming up.
Even if your manager sees it as a formality, you can still make it useful. For yourself.
1. Prepare in Advance
Don’t just show up to chat. Spend an hour or two beforehand and:
Gather your results from the year.
Don’t assume your manager remembers everything. They don’t. They have 20 people, 100 projects, a million tabs open.
List out:
- Which projects you completed
- Which problems you solved (especially tricky or high-stakes ones)
- What outcomes you delivered (use numbers if possible: time saved, metrics improved, clients gained)
- Where you took initiative (pitched ideas, supported others, handled extras)
It’s not bragging. It’s your work. If you don’t show it, no one will know.
2. Think about what you want to discuss
Don’t wait for your manager to read your mind. Ask yourself:
- Am I happy with what I do?
- What do I want to try next?
- What do I want to learn?
- What’s holding me back?
What’s demotivating or frustrating me?
You don’t have to bring up everything. But you should at least know what’s important to you. - What’s demotivating or frustrating me?
You don’t have to bring up everything. But you should at least know what’s important to you.
3. Prepare questions for your manager
For example:
- What do you see as my strengths? Where could I be more valuable?
- What should I improve or change?
- Are there opportunities to try a new role/project/direction?
- How can I grow in the team? What would it take?
4. Be honest – but choose your words
If something’s off, say it. But not like: “Everything sucks, everyone’s clueless.” Find a way to smooth it up still giving direct feedback:
Instead of: “Our team is a mess.” Try: “I think we could use more clarity on priorities. Sometimes it’s hard to tell what matters most.”
Instead of: “I’m bored, the work is dull.” Try: “I’d love to take on something more complex where I can grow.”
Your manager isn’t a mind-reader. If you say nothing, they’ll assume everything’s fine.
5. If your manager isn’t listening – document it
Sometimes, no matter how well you prepare, the person across from you nods but doesn’t hear you.
Then:
- Send a follow-up email: “Thanks for the meeting. As I understood, we agreed on X, Y, and Z. Did I get that right?”
- If nothing happens, remind them in a couple of weeks.
- If your request for growth/training/change is ignored, go to HR or someone higher up.
It might not help. But at least you’ll know you did your part. And you can decide: stay or go.
6. Track your progress throughout the year
Don’t wait until December to remember what you did in February.
Make a simple file or note and once a month, jot down:
- What you did that mattered
- What results you got
- What new things you tried
- How you helped the team
- What feedback you received
By the end of the year, you’ll have a clear picture. You won’t scramble before the review. And it’ll help when asking for a raise or updating your resume.
What companies should do to make this work
If you’re on the business side – HR, a manager, a founder – here’s what you can do:
1. Explain to managers why this matters to them
Not just “because we said so.” Help them see the real benefits:
- They’ll catch issues earlier
- They’ll retain strong people
- They’ll spot internal growth potential
- They’ll get honest feedback about how things actually work
2. Give them real tools
Not just a question template. Also:
- Training: how to ask, listen, and give feedback
- Examples of both good and bad conversations
- A checklist to help them prepare (not for the employee, for themselves)
Support: who to go to when a situation is tricky
3. Make the process flexible
One template for all sounds nice, but teams are different. People are different. Let managers adapt the format to their context.
4. Stop measuring success by forms submitted
The form isn’t the goal. The quality of the conversation is. Ask:
What did you learn?
What will change after this?
Who needs support? - Support: who to go to when a situation is tricky
3. Make the process flexible
One template for all sounds nice, but teams are different. People are different. Let managers adapt the format to their context.
4. Stop measuring success by forms submitted
The form isn’t the goal. The quality of the conversation is. Ask: what did you learn? What will change after this? Who needs support?
5. Build a culture of ongoing feedback
If a manager never has real conversations with their people throughout the year, one meeting won’t change anything.
Annual reviews should be part of a continuous, honest relationship.
Final thought
Annual reviews can be one of the most powerful tools we have. For growth. For retention. For understanding what’s happening in the team. But only if they’re not just a formality.
That requires:
Managers who get it and have the skills
HR that supports instead of controls
Employees who prepare and speak honestly
A company culture where the truth is safe to speak
Otherwise, it’s just a very expensive waste of time. For everyone.
- Managers who get it and have the skills
- HR that supports instead of controls
Employees who prepare and speak honestly
A company culture where the truth is safe to speak
Otherwise, it’s just a very expensive waste of time. For everyone. - Employees who prepare and speak honestly
A company culture where the truth is safe to speak
Otherwise, it’s just a very expensive waste of time. For everyone. - A company culture where the truth is safe to speak
Otherwise, it’s just a very expensive waste of time. For everyone.